Matt Lauer is the Queen of My Ass

I don't know what exactly that means, but it's an old derogatory phrase I used to say when I was a freshman in college. At the time it applied to my roommate, who smoked cigarettes in my bed and made our dorm room reek of butter and cheese; now it applies to Matt Lauer, who's hosting something even stinkier than my old dorm room.

Lauer's hosting the "100 Greatest Americans" special on Discovery Channel. They started with 100 greatest Americans during the first Sunday of June, and every Sunday since, have narrowed down the list. They've just widdled it down to the top five, and much to my shock, not one woman is among the list. Not one. Not one woman has done anything worthwhile enough to compete with the likes of Ronald Reagan (who's in the top five). In fact, of the top 25 spots, only three women took spots: Oprah Winfrey, Rosa Parks, and Eleanor Roosevelt.

George W. F*cking Bush made the top 25; Lance Armstrong made the top 25; Billy Graham made the top 25; Bob Hope made the top 25...but only three American women matched their contribution to the world. What a crock.

I wouldn't be so mad about this, except I bet 98% of the people watching this are getting their history lessons from it. So instead of hearing about people like Jane Addams, Ida Tarbell, Alice Paul, Toni Morrison, Louisa May Alcott, Clara Barton, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Shirley Jackson, Dolores Huerta, Sally Ride, Sacagawea, Billie Holiday...I could probably go on forever...coveted spots on the top 100 went to Donald Trump, Brett Favre, Rush Limbaugh, Hugh Hefner, Dr. Phil McGraw, Tom Cruise, Mel Gibson, and FOUR members of the Bush family.

OK, so I know I'm a whiney liberal, but for God's sake, what does it say about the state of our culture when we celebrate the contribution of Hugh Hefner over the contribution of Alice Paul? "I'm sorry, Alice Paul. I know you were one of the biggest reasons women won the right to vote in this country, and I guess that's a good thing. But Hugh Hefner's given us tits! Tits all over the pages of magazines! Tits all throughout the racks of publications at 7-11! Yee-haw!!"

Matt Lauer should be embarrassed, both for hosting this show, and for that haircut he got a couple of years ago.