Good Grief
Later this morning, I'll be attending a church service to mark "All Souls Day," a day in which people remember those who have died and gone before. This year the day feels especially relevant to me, as earlier this Fall I lost a dear friend, Jeff Mendez, to cancer. It only took about three and a half weeks from the time his cancer reoccured to the day his kidneys stopped working and shut down. Another friend of mine is currently with her mother, who is in hospice, another victim of cancer.
Death and loss are such a heavy burden to bear. Whether it's the physical loss of a loved one, the loss of time, or the end of a life's chapter, the grief can certainly leave us broken and beaten down. I know there are moments where I ache to go back five years, ten years, twenty years, and be back in a moment that felt particularly special. Like the last time my entire family sat down at a table and ate, before brothers and sisters went to college, got married, took jobs out of town. Or back to a time when my dad or mom could carry me up to bed when I fell asleep on the couch, before my mom had her stroke, before I got older.
I think the fact that life is just too god damn fast can really leave us broken.
But as Ernest Hemingway said, "The world breaks everyone, and afterward many are strong at the broken places." Doesn't that account for a healthy chunk of life: tending to our broken places.
For those that weave down the path of remembrance every once in a while, here is a poem by Washington Allston that usually makes me teary, especially as I watch my own parents grow old.
Especially as I watch myself grow older.
It all goes by so fast. It's good to remind ourselves that time can't take everything with it.
Boyhood
AH, then how sweetly closed those crowded days!
The minutes parting one by one like rays,
That fade upon a summer's eve.
But O, what charm or magic numbers
Can give me back the gentle slumbers
Those weary, happy days did leave?
When by my bed I saw my mother kneel,
And with her blessing took her nightly kiss;
Whatever Time destroys, he cannot this;--
E'en now that nameless kiss I feel.
- Washington Allston
Have a great day, everyone.
Death and loss are such a heavy burden to bear. Whether it's the physical loss of a loved one, the loss of time, or the end of a life's chapter, the grief can certainly leave us broken and beaten down. I know there are moments where I ache to go back five years, ten years, twenty years, and be back in a moment that felt particularly special. Like the last time my entire family sat down at a table and ate, before brothers and sisters went to college, got married, took jobs out of town. Or back to a time when my dad or mom could carry me up to bed when I fell asleep on the couch, before my mom had her stroke, before I got older.
I think the fact that life is just too god damn fast can really leave us broken.
But as Ernest Hemingway said, "The world breaks everyone, and afterward many are strong at the broken places." Doesn't that account for a healthy chunk of life: tending to our broken places.
For those that weave down the path of remembrance every once in a while, here is a poem by Washington Allston that usually makes me teary, especially as I watch my own parents grow old.
Especially as I watch myself grow older.
It all goes by so fast. It's good to remind ourselves that time can't take everything with it.
AH, then how sweetly closed those crowded days!
The minutes parting one by one like rays,
That fade upon a summer's eve.
But O, what charm or magic numbers
Can give me back the gentle slumbers
Those weary, happy days did leave?
When by my bed I saw my mother kneel,
And with her blessing took her nightly kiss;
Whatever Time destroys, he cannot this;--
E'en now that nameless kiss I feel.
- Washington Allston
Have a great day, everyone.
posted by MikeJ at
10:13 AM
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