The necessity of doubt

One of the privileges of living in Cambridge is being so close to Harvard's Memorial Church, where Rev. Peter Gomes, one of the most gifted preachers that I've ever read or heard, calls home.

He was in Connecticut today, so the throngs of people that showed up to see him were probably disappointed.

Thankfully, in his place, was the Rev. Dorothy Austin, who gave a phenomenal sermon on doubt, and the role of doubt in our lives. Kahlil Gibrain, author of "The Alchemist," said that "Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother." Rev. Austin drew those same connections today, and managed to slam the Bush administration at the same time, which is always incentive enough for me to wake up early on a Sunday morning.

Bush, who at this point must be willing to do anything to deflect attention away from FoleyGate, apparently told Bob Woodward that "I will not withdraw even if Laura and Barney are the only ones who support me." Of course he's talking about Iraq, and of course Bush is showing once again his most brutal, offensive flaw: his inability to even hint at the potential for some self-reflection. Bush doesn't doubt. He doesn't doubt his foreign policy, he doesn't doubt his Cabinet, he doesn't doubt his Vice-President, his political party, his big-name donors.

What's the harm of this? Well, for one, without doubt and self-reflection, it makes you impervious to criticism, which might explain the all-out assault on anyone who's ever bothered to speak ill of the Bush machine. Secondly, without doubt and self-reflection, you can never fully appreciate your mistakes. I'm reminded of the 2004 debate between Bush and John Kerry, when moderator Charlie Gibson asked Bush to name a mistake that he made. Bush didn't name one...said he couldn't name one.

Funny, off the top of my head, I can think of more than 2,700 mistakes he's made, and they all begin with Sgt., or Lt., or Cpl., Capt., or the many other titles that have been engraved on tombstones since the March 2003 invasion of Iraq.

Rev. Austin used for her sermon today the backdrop of the story in Matthew about Peter being told by Jesus to walk on water. To paraphrase (and I'm not the best at relaying scripture stories), Peter and the disciples are out in a boat in the sea, when a storm comes in and puts them in real danger. Afraid, the disciples start to panic. As they are being thrashed around in the boat, they see an image walking on the water toward them. At first they are afriad, not sure of who the person is, even after Jesus identifies himself. Peter, showing his tendency for doubt, says to Jesus "If you really are Jesus, command me to walk on water." Jesus does, and Peter low-and-behold starts to walk on water. But soon Peter feels unsteady, starts sinking, and in a panic cries our for Jesus to save him. Jesus does, and in doing so gives one of the oft-quoted lines of the New Testament: "O Ye of Little Faith...why did you doubt?"

Many right-wingers interpret this passage as "See, since Peter believed in Jesus, he got saved." As Rev. Austin pointed out this morning, it wasn't Peter's faith that saved him....it was his doubt. Jesus isn't issuing a condemnation, or passing judgment in his statement...he's merely asking a question.

As I heard that, I couldn't help but think how if only our President and his cronies would doubt once in a while, how much better off we might be today, how many mistakes we might not have made. Instead, they don't doubt. And we don't encourage them to. We label any politician that might doubt a "flip-flopper," or any business leader that might doubt "weak," or any journalist that might doubt "part of the left-wing media."

Hannah Arendt, a political theorist who reported on the Eichmann Trial in the aftermath of World War II for The New Yorker, wrote that "The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be good or evil."

This morning, I have very little doubt that the path of this evil is rooted in an inability to self-reflect. After all, making up your mind about something requires deep thought and deep consideration of all the options on the table. It does not mean thinking you know all the answers, and then failing to check your conscience every once in a while because you're afraid of what it might say.

Have a great Sunday, everyone.